Chewing The Fat

The fat just walks away, apparently. Unfortunately, despite the claims, the gristly bits that are impossible to digest and stick in your teeth will very likely be lodged there forever. I don't think the bad taste left in my mouth after tonight's Doctor Who Season Four premiere will be going away soon. The memory of those lardy Gremlins waving from the mothership window will probably also be with me from now until the day I die.
You know, just like those memorable scenes of old - yes, it's right up there with the Sea Devils rising from the ocean that's stuck with me since childhood. Um, no. No, that's a fond inspirational image, the sort of stuff that fired my childhood imagination. All those Pilsbury Dough Munchkins parading down the street are a horrible, horrible memory that will likely leave a stain.
You'll also remember how the old Doctor Who would have these big organisations that, because of budgetary problems, only had about two guards on the payroll... back then it was perhaps forgiveable, here it's merely laughable. But then, there's no excuse for the utter tripe (ha) that was on display throughout this whole sorry business.
Don't get me wrong, there were some nice touches in the mix. But I feel no inclination to dwell on them even now, because I know those will not be the enduring memories from this experience. Nicest moment for me had to be the scene of the Doctor and Donna mouthing silently to one another through a couple of windows. Naturally, this is a vast improvement on having Catherine Tate shout her way through The Runaway Bride. Such a pity they're going back to allowing her to speak for the rest of the series.
Even a less annoying entirely silent Tate could not have saved this though. The new mangled , could-it-be-any-busier theme sets up an aggravating, negative vibe from the get-go, and after some fairly amusing shenanigans of not quite letting the Doctor and Donna meet, we're into a wholly insubstantial daftfest with a plot that might have gotten away with it in The Sarah Jane Adventures, or whatever more juvenile spin off they come up with for the CBeebies.
Fat generally suggests weight and while I understand that you couldn't do a plot like this with any kind of seriousness, this was so high in fat and yet entirely weight-free, it's something of a miracle in itself. Added to which, there is the touchier issue of whether it actually manages to be offensive to people with real weight problems. Fat is funny, fat people have always been great comedy material - look at Little & Large for goodness sake. Rusty worshippers will defend him heartily on this point and accuse anyone suggesting anything of the kind of making something out of nothing. Irrespective of that 'debate', it was at best an expensive cheap joke and I'd argue that it's Partners In Crime that made something out of nothing. Only, not very much.
Honestly, I wish it would just walk away.